Making a Comeback

Hello all my friends!

I know it's been such a long time since I've been writing- nevermind having the presence of mind or motivation to make any new jewelry creations... Truth be told, I've been an absolute wreck for the past 5 months. Since my early 20's, I've had back problems on and off, but mostly just because I strained myself too hard. However, in March 2007 I had a very bad car accident which I was very lucky to have walked away from. Later that same year, right after Christmas, I slipped and fell down our stairs- bouncing down each one (it seemed) right on my lower vertebrae because I had curled up a little to try and stop myself. While very painful, I still managed to get to work and do my thing. In spring of 2008 I moved down to VA where I was being treated by a chiropracter that was fabulous. He really got me back to "normal", as close as I could get, and I was feeling pretty human. Still- there were days I'd have a spasm, or not feel so great... But they were getting to be spaced farther apart with each "flare up".

At the beginning of March this year, I noticed I had a spasm coming on, and it was quite intense. After seeking out my doctor, she had refused to give me medication for fear that I would stop breathing. Yes- this wasn't over the counter medication- I needed a severe pain reliever and muscle relaxant, which I was used to taking only with bad flare ups and only when I absolutely needed it. She relented and gave me a few pain pills, but those lasted me 2 1/2 days. After that, I sought out a neurologist and waited weeks to be seen- and when the appointment came, he told me everything I was feeling was in my head. I should give up, since I already went through all other avenues of therapy. I was not happy- at all. And through all this, my back was getting worse and worse. Sleepless nights, uncomfortable standing up, sitting or laying down. Coughing or sneezing was excruciating.

So I had my parents come pick me up and bring me back home to get treatment. My Dr. C has been fantastic, but he wanted an opinion of a neurologist (Dr. C is an Osteopath) regarding my condition since he wasn't really able to help me the way he wanted. Reason? I've been falling down randomly, and without warning. I have no idea when it's going to happen- it's totally random and without warning. Well- long story short- I wasted time with the "neurologist" and I'm now back ot seeing my Dr. C. This has been a very difficult road, as we're trying and testing medications to see how well they work. "Neurologist" was happy keeping me on epileptic medication, which was also a pain reliever, and a painkiller too. The safest dose for someone to be on is 1200mg a day, and as of last week I was up to 1500mg and he wanted to increase it more. I said no. Bottom line- I'm not going back to him. I'm looking for the reason I hurt, the reason for the pain, the reason for falling down. I'm not looking for a band-aid to cover the problem. And I'm not epileptic.

Since last week, I've been on a new medication for Fibromyalgia. I haven't been diagnosed with it, but the medication itself seems to be helping just as much as the other one I was on- but minus the head fogginess, disorientation, drowsiness and general sloth behavior. It left me feeling like I was underwater, breathing on an almost empty tank. And no motivation to move, get up, move a little bit. I was parked in this very chair I'm sitting in... Sleeping most of my days away. This new medication does make me drowsy- but it comes in waves. My pain seems to finally be not so severe, though I'd like it to nothing- but I'm sure that will come in due time.

Dr. C has diagnosed me, finally after all these months, as having Failed Back Syndrome. While it's most commonly developed after having back surgery, it also exhibits itself if a severe trauma has occurred. I've never had back surgery, and from what they can see- I don't have anything ruptured or separated in there, so there is no need for it. I'm having a nerve and ligament problem. The medications I'm on now, coupled with treatment which will start soon, should help me get back to normal.... Which means up, moving, doing all the fun things I've missed out on the past months. Said trauma would be the combination of my car accident and falling down the stairs in 2007, and me not having help with the spasm when it started exhibiting itself back in March 2010.

Had the doctors simply given me a little more pain medication, a muscle relaxer, and a note to work keeping me out for 2-3 days- this wouldn't have blown up into this mess it is. With the combination of the spasm working itself in so deeply, and the random falling down because I'd lose all feeling in my right leg from my hip down- it didn't allow nerve blocks, prednisone (steroid) courses multiple times over the past months, and OD adjustments partially done by Dr. C to work correctly. The ligaments in my lumbar area are so torn and stretched, they didn't heal correctly. As a result, each time I would take it easy and recover from a spasm- I was allowing it to get weaker and weaker without even knowing it. When this particular spasm started in March, the only way my body could protect itself was to throw me into this unbelievable kink, so horrible I could barely move. This helped keep my bones where they were- unfortunately.... They were out of alignment and in the wrong place. I've been so torqued up since, Dr. C's had a very hard time adjusting me and putting the vertebrae where they belong in there. The latest adjustment was Thursday, and already Friday evening while reaching for my cup of water I felt it pop out again.

I was still in excruciating pain. But... Today...  I'm finding I'm feeling a little bit better now. Every little increase helps SO much. Since it's rainy, I'm hurting more than usual... But it's better than being about ready to crawl the walls for relief. This new medication helps the body to cover the nerves with thicker casings- therefore, we're hoping- I'll not hurt so much, and the falling down will stop. It will also allow my Doctor to manipulate me in order to get my bones in the right place. If it still is stubborn and doesn't work, there's another option I'll have to look in to... But I'll deal with that when the time comes.

So my apologies to you for ranting and rambling a bit... I felt I owed it to everyone to give an explanation as to why I've been missing so often the past months, and especially weeks. I'm looking forward to being more present online!